#5 Harmonious Music

    "This is a bit embarrassing," whispered Loosey, who'd changed the spelling of her name by deed poll, (but that's another story), "I don't know where to start."

Karl performed a deep and harmonious cough, almost completely in tune with itself and sounding like a band of gypsies blowing medieval pipes from within his lungs.  Loosey estimated the chord was closest to Eb with a fourth.   After momentarily pausing to splutter the single utterance, "Quite!", Karl produced a further offering; this time varied enough in pitch and tone to score for an expanded orchestra.  Simultaneously, he fished a hard sweet from his pocket.  Placing it inside his mouth inside the beard he began to suck hard, and this seemed to do the trick. 

 

A silence fell giving both the chance to take stock and examine the neutral territory, sparse but for the circle of white plastic chairs placed around the centre of the room.

    "Well, let's start by sitting comfortably."

This was tough.  They knew they were due for an argument; it was probably easy once they'd managed to locate the first words.  Loosey wished she wasn't such a failure that it had come to this, and Karl wished he could smoke.  Awkwardly, they settled into two random chairs.

    "It's pretty obvious neither of us have done this before.  They didn't match us very well did they?  Would have been better if we weren't both newbies."

     "Let's make the best of it shall we?"  Loosey was getting frustrated.  "How about we begin the way they suggested, look what it says here…" She was pointing to the literature they'd been handed at reception, "get into the mindset of your friends who regularly argue; if necessary role play and become those friends. Well, I'll think of Melly and Mit.  I've known them for years; they told me their arguments could be scripts by Beckett, or Bleasdale. "

Karl didn't respond.  She tried again.

     "Well, who will you think of then?"

     "I shall think of my two fish.  And of my vet."

Loosey really couldn't stand him one more minute; he was so difficult!

     "As you wish.  And what shall we argue about?  They didn't give any tips on that bit, did they?"

A silence fell once again, for a long time this time.  A clock on the wall began to tick loudly.

     "Depressing isn't it?  I don't know about you, but-"

She broke off.  Her words were getting lost under a new outbreak from Karl.

       "- I don't know about you but…." Loosey was almost having to shout over his agitated concerto for trombone and timpani, "but it looks like I can't even have a good argument with someone, let alone find the perfect person to share my life with. I'm cancelling my subscription!  To hell with their crummy advertising, it doesn't work.  You can only really have a proper fight with someone you already love."  

Loosey screamed the last words as loud as she could while Karl's coughing threatened to consume them, before slamming the door as she took off, resigning herself to a life of not discordant singledom.

©LolaPerrin2010